No Limits

Choose a path, choose a career and stick with it. There are many things that have always held an interest in my heart. Most subjects take many years of studying and work in that field to master.

To become a master of that craft take concentration on such a singular field, but all I want to do is spread out of a vast field of subjects.

Space has always held a mysterious love in my heart. For the longest time I wanted nothing more then to become an astronaut, which I quickly realized wasn't feasible due to my height and Diabetes. Despite the fact that I gave up my dream of going to space a long time ago, my heart still beats with excitement thinking about NASA and about space. I could gaze at the stars under a telescope all night if given the opportunity.

Musical theatre is the love I have been most expressive about. From the time I can remember I have been performing in front of family with my sister. When moving to the United States my parents had my sister and I audition for "The Fiddler on the Roof" at our local theatre and we got the parts. Every year after that my summers were spent participating, and later working, at the youth and teen theatre workshops. Theatre and music were the majors that followed me through college, at least until I realized that something was missing.

Health and medicine were forced upon me by what I used to think of as my curse, Diabetes. After much thought and struggle I came to realize that it was not a curse but rather another path to follow in my life. I research health related topics constantly, most of them to do with food, and try to fill my mind with knowledge to help myself become healthier then I am. It has been this researched which sparked a fire to go to medical school and become a doctor.

As I sat yesterday watching the Oscars I was overcome with the feel of panic that I must choose only one thing to learn and do in my life and to commit myself only to it. After all, can we truly master anything if our time is split between many things? If I try to feed all aspects of my hungry mind won't I be spread too thin? Wouldn't it be better to starve out or at least minimize the desires of the other portions of my brain and just focus on one thing? Would it be so horrible to become a doctor who partakes in theatre while studying the universe and what part we have in it? Can medicine, theatre, music, and space, all be part of my life at the same time?

After much thought I have come out of my questioning with a resounding yes. Perhaps as I grow I will slowly focus my life more into one area of study and passion, but I don't believe that I need to do that right now. I have set up limitations and walls for myself all my life and I am done doing that. I don't need to limit myself to becoming a doctor or auditioning for theatre or taking voice lessons.

I have spent so much of my life being afraid of time. If my time runs out that is fine, as long as I get to do what I love then I am living life the way I want. Limitations ruled my life for so long, I am curious to see what happens when I remove them and just go for it.